The In-Between: What Nobody Tells You About Starting Over in Your 40s
There's a part of starting over that doesn't make it onto Instagram. It's not the "we did it!" moment or the big reveal. It's the middle. The learning-which-way-to-turn, figuring-out-which-grocery-store-we-like, sorting-out-all-the-housing-stuff middle. The finding-a-new-vet-and-groomer-for-our-babies middle. (I did find a hairstylist, so I'm calling that a major win.)
Matt & I left Minnesota for the Florida Gulf Coast, and our new home is still being built. Some days it feels like a dream. Other days it feels like we're living in a waiting room with really good weather.
Fall Hasn't Gone as Planned (Yet)
I had a whole fall bucket list ready for October. Pumpkin patches, cozy drives, little fall festivals, all of it. Then the hurricane came through and put a big pause on everything.
This was our very first hurricane, and coming from Minnesota, it was a whole new kind of weather to learn. We spent days watching the radar, listening to our neighbors' advice, and figuring out what "being prepared" really means down here. It humbled me fast and reminded me how little we actually control.
So instead of a fall roundup this week, I want to talk about the in-between. Because I think a lot of us are in one, whether or not we moved across the country.
Routines Don't Move With You
In Minnesota, I knew my morning. I knew my favorite spots, my errands, my people.
Here, I'm building that rhythm from scratch. New walks with the pets. New favorite places to grab lunch or dinner. New stores, new roads, new everything. The one thing that didn't have to change? My work. With Bravenly, I can work from literally anywhere, and that is freedom I never take for granted.
The biggest adjustment has been people. We don't have any friends or family down here yet, so we're starting fresh with meeting new faces and building our community. One thing we're so grateful for: we recently found a church we love, and we can't wait to go back. It already feels like a little piece of home.
Let me be clear: we do not regret this decision for one second. It's just a lot of new all at once, and getting used to new takes a little time.
What's Helping Me Right Now
Small anchors. A morning walk, my favorite wellness products, time with Matt and the pets. Little things that feel like home even when everything else is new.
Saying yes to exploring. Day trips, new restaurants, wandering into cute shops. Every new place makes this area feel a little more like mine.
Putting ourselves out there. Saying hi to neighbors, showing up at church, and being open to new friendships, even when it feels a little awkward at first.
Giving myself grace. Not every day has to be productive, and it's OK if some days feel a little off.
Remembering why we did this. Sunshine, the beach, a slower pace, and a fresh chapter we chose on purpose.
To My Women in Their 40s (and Beyond)
I'm 46, and if there's one thing people know about me, it's that I love a fresh start. I'm adventurous, I'm not afraid to take a risk, and I've never been one to hold on to things just because they're familiar. Trying new things is what makes me feel alive.
But I know not everyone feels that way. So many women I talk to wonder if they're "too settled" or "too old" to start over. I'm here to tell you: you're not.
The in-between isn't something to be scared of. It's where the good stuff happens. It means you didn't stay stuck. It means you chose something new.
Whatever your "move" is, whether it's a new state, a new business, a new hobby, or just finally putting yourself first, you're not too late. You're right on time.
The middle is messy. Go anyway.
What's Next
We're hoping to squeeze in some fall fun this weekend and through the rest of October, so stay tuned. I'll bring you along for all of it, the cute stuff and the real stuff.
Are you in an in-between season right now? I'd love to hear about it in the comments.
XO - Kari Lynn
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